this wasn’t how i started
i only type in times new roman
because i think i like to sound profound and the aesthetic of the font
will somehow add intellectuality
but really i think it’s just
conformity made into a habit
and really i think it’s just
my fear of never being good
enough never being
enough
and really i have blood on my lip right now while i type and blood on
my index finger and pink on
my laptop keys because
i’ve pulled the skin off my bottom lip yet again for maybe the third time today and it’s
only 10 am
and i like to pretend that it’s a
nervous habit but really now
it’s just a habit that i don’t have
the will to stop
and i should stop because
broken sorry
chapped sorry
split sorry
bleeding sorry
scabbed
lips do not make good impressions
and the apologies that always fall from my stuttering tongue are
perpetually written on my torn lips because somewhere
in the cloudy parts of my head
i think if i pull away enough layers of skin i might find the root of
perfection cowering between my bones
About the Author: Josie Renner is an 18-year-old from Warm Springs, Georgia. She is co-founder and editor-in-chief of her school’s online newspaper, The Renaissance, and has also has a nationally published piece in the America Library of Poetry’s collection, Together. She plans to pursue a journalism degree upon entering college in the fall and hopes to continue influencing the world through the power of literature and writing.
